Lawyers, the Good Life and Work: What Really Matters in 2013
Last week a young attorney I coach asked why I left the practice of law to pursue a career in psychology and professional development. The answers to such questions are never simple. A lawyer friend died suddenly. I realized that life is short and offers no guarantees. I started thinking about what made me happy. When I put it all together, I was not a happy lawyer and it seemed unlikely this would change.
I had what many would consider a great practice as a partner with an AmLaw 200 firm. I worked with good smart people. I had plenty of clients with good work. But ultimately, to be a happy lawyer and a strong lawyer, I believe you must love practicing law. Although many of my partners did, I did not.
Where does happiness and well being come from? A few years ago, I had the good fortune to participate in Dr. Martin Seligman's Authentic Happiness coach training program. In his latest book, Flourishing, Seligman, a Professor at the University of Pennsylvania and former President of the American Psychological Association, proposes that the good life, one in which individuals and the planet flourish, is one in which "well being" is maximized. Well being is comprised of five elements (known by the acronym PERMA):
- Positive Emotions: Simply put, good feelings. For example,feeling joy, gratitude, serenity, interest, hope, pride, amusement, awe or love. In the moment as you work, how often do you feel these feelings? As a lawyer, I did not feel these enough. My former law partner Emily Parker often talks about the fun she has practicing law and how important it is to keep that in a firm's culture.
- Engagement: Becoming so immersed in an activity that you lose time and are in "flow." When I started reading books on psychology and human behavior, I lost time. I found myself reading dense texts for fun in a way that I had never experienced with law books. To this day when I coach my clients or lead a retreat, the time seems to fly by. By contrast, one of my lawyer friends became totally immersed arguing about the law when on vacation with her lawyer boyfriend. That told me I was in the wrong space. What parts of your practice put you in flow? How can you get more of that in 2013?
- Meaning: Contributing your gifts and strengths to something bigger than you. As a young lawyer I took a pro bono case. I found that I was much more interested in helping my client at an emotional and motivational level than I was in her legal issues. Being her lawyer, did not bring me satisfaction even though I thought it should. I contrast that with the great pleasure some of my lawyer colleagues find in righting a wrong for pro bono clients. For example Jones Day partner Sally Crawford takes joy and pride in being known as the "queen of pro bono." Over her career, Sally has devoted countless hours to serving pro bono clients and derived great satisfaction from this work.
- Relationships: Satisfying relationships with others. Positive relationships with colleagues and clients kept me in law for ten years. To this day, my best friends are the lawyers and clients I met in those early years. If you are working with great people, you know the importance of what I'm talking about. If not, how can you change that? How do you make time for positive relationships with colleagues, clients, friends and family?
- Accomplishment: Humans have a drive to accomplish. Of course accomplishment comes in many forms. For me, accomplishment is about helping others succeed and mastering new skills. It just makes me feel great. Lawyers who love their work take joy in accomplishment on behalf of their firms and clients and love meeting new challenges.
A final word about well being and happiness. A strong body of research demonstrates that people who maximize PERMA in their lives, are healthier, happier and more successful. As you set your work goals for 2013, how will you create a life of happiness and well being?
Comments (11)
Read through and enter the discussion by using the form at the endDale Kermode writes on 13/01/01 @ 11:03AM
Well done – LOVE the content and message – a great way to start 2013.
Luther Jones writes on 13/01/01 @ 9:18PM
I agree with your message. I live, now, by the adage, "Happiness is not a goal unto itself; happiness is a by-product of achievement of some other goal."
Natalie Loeb writes on 13/01/02 @ 7:19AM
Cynthia, you have just put into words the answer I was looking for when I was asked recently, "What is it about you that drives you to coach others?" I find it interesting how you allowed yourself to find what it is that gives you satisfaction. It is courageous and not always the easy thing to do, however, as can be seen by your article, very rewardiing.
As of yet I have not had a coaching client, who left his/her chosen profession. However, I have had the pleassure of seeing clients discover their PERMA as they work on honing their ability to lead others. It certainly makes a difference. Thank you for sharing this!
Gary Rifkin writes on 13/01/02 @ 9:18AM
What a great way to start out the year! I am always inspired by your insights. :-)
Andrew Cohn writes on 13/01/02 @ 12:47PM
Very nice piece, Cynthia. Thank you.
It takes courage to look at our choices and recognize that sometimes we need to make a change. That what worked for us in years past no longer serves us, and accordingly we can no longer serve others as well.
Shifting out of a career in law can feel like tossing aside a winning ticket (I know that at times it felt that way when I made that transition) but there are many ways to stay close to the profession and to areas of law that interest us.
Your post is a reminder of what is available to us in our work. Reflecting on the PERMA elements is a powerful exercise in assessing our happiness and can be a springboard for proactively leading ourselves to more of what will make us happy. In my experience, our work need not score 10 out of 10 in all five of these categories (although that would be great); our work only needs to reach a level of happiness that, on balance, supports our life balance and goals.
Nic Campbell writes on 13/01/02 @ 2:02PM
Well written, well said.
Jill king writes on 13/01/03 @ 8:56AM
It seems to me that too many people, and particularly lawyers, stay in careers that do not bring them the sense of personal satisfaction and well-being that we can all achieve. It may mean asking oneself some fundamental questions but given how hard lawyers work, continuing for the status, the money or the lack of courage to break out, is a sad waste. Carpe Diem.
Cynthia Pladziewicz writes on 13/01/04 @ 5:23AM
Thanks Andrew. I have never regretted the time I spent in law school and practice as a lawyer for the very reasons you mention.
Cynthia Pladziewicz writes on 13/01/04 @ 5:29AM
Jill,
Thanks for your very thoughtful comments. There are so many things lawyers can do to be happier short of leaving the profession (even though for some that ends up being the best choice). Many lawyers I work with choose to stay in law but adjust their work so that it resonates for them. That also requires great courage. And yes, Carpe Diem!
Cynthia Pladziewicz writes on 13/01/04 @ 5:32AM
Agreed. I lot of lawyers and others clients come to me with dissatisfaction around their profession and the solution is usually something short of leaving it. There are so many intermediate steps that can add PERMA.
Erin Callahan writes on 13/01/22 @ 1:09PM
Great article Cynthia! Thank you for posting.